When a woman is pregnant, the weirdest and most random things can stick in her mind. Something about a pregnant belly just makes people feel like sharing their advice – both good and bad and in this age of endless information it can be important for someone who is with child to guard her heart…and mind. Pregnant women, especially those who are close to the end, need a “bubble”. A pregnancy bubble protects them from the well meaning stranger who has a labor horror story they feel compelled to share, the random blog or comment on a facebook feed that just won’t get out of your head or the overly concerned friend or relative.
Most pregnant women will encounter at least some debbie-downer stories or input at the end of their pregnancy and it can plant a seed of negativity that is not helpful for staying positive at the end of a pregnancy or in preparing for a great labor experience. Creating this pregnancy bubble can be essential in the final days of pregnancy (that sometime seem endless!). Here are some ways to create a pregnancy bubble:
- Turn off Facebook. Or limit your newsfeed drastically. Crazy stuff happens on Facebook.
- Avoid pregnancy blogs unless they are encouraging.
- Limit your questions to a few select friends, your doula and your care provider. You want people around you that support your choices and are excited to meet your baby…but not so excited that they call you every day asking if you are still pregnant.
- Use this time to focus on you and what makes this pregnancy special. Every pregnancy is different, so learn what this one has to teach you and embrace it for what it is. That may include finding out if your baby bump looks even cuter with a pedicure.
- Trade phones with your partner. You will have a phone if you need it, but you avoid the constant calls/texts/emails asking about the baby. You do not need to answer “No, the baby isn’t here yet” 50 times a day.
- Take a walk outside. It is healthy for you and baby and is relaxing. It just makes sense to spend some time outside, being a human. (If you are in the Dallas and Fort Worth area, don’t take this advice in August. Being 9 months pregnant and walking outside is more likely to create a pregnancy oven, not a pregnancy bubble.)
- Slow down and limit your commitments. This is going to be necessary in the postpartum period, so now is a good time to slow down, rest and relax. As a bonus, this will ease others around you into stepping up and helping thus making for an easier transition when the baby arrives.
- Spend time with your partner and immediate family. Take advantage of this time to enjoy the person that you chose to help you bring new life into this world. Remember why they were your choice, and just enjoy each other. Make a point to do something that you will not be able to do after the baby comes (at least for a while).
It is ok to take this time to step back and reflect on the major life changing events that are about to happen, and it is ok to not do that in front of everyone. Quality, not quantity is key here, and take the time to pick your support group carefully so that you can make the most out of this amazing time in your life. When the well meaning stranger at the grocery store tries to share a labor or birth horror story about her best friend’s second cousin’s niece, just smile and tell her you are in your pregnancy bubble….and maybe consider sending your partner out for food next time.
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Beth Dickerson is one of the original team members of Great Expectations Birth. Beth serves as a birth doula and childbirth educator in the Dallas and Fort Worth area and is experienced serving women in all types of birth choices. You can read more about Beth and inquire about her services at www.greatexpectationsbirth.com